But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold. Job 23:10
You can do this. The fear may never go away so you must determine to move forward in spite of it. You knew it wouldn’t be easy, but you probably didn’t expect it to be this hard. God knew how difficult this would be for you and He already had a plan to be strength in your weakness.
You may be angry that God has not ended your trial, answered your pleading, or healed what hurts. You may be tired of all the answers you know you should believe. Please don’t stop believing. Part of persevering means continuing to obey God when it makes no sense to you. Just because you don’t think you are improving does not mean you’re stagnant. You are not always the best judge in measuring your growth while you’re growing. God has said He will be faithful to complete the work He began in you, but that means you keep going even when you don’t feel like it. It also means exercising the humility of surrendering to His process. Why make it harder than necessary?
One day you will reap the reward of persevering, but only if you keep going. You are not in this alone, but you alone can choose to finish well. You’ve come too far to turn back now.